On Life and Change (Unexpected Lessons from the Barbie Movie)
"That's life. It's all change."
These were the words spoken to Barbie after her exacerbated reflection:
"Change is hard."
Change is the first thing that comes to mind when it comes to my personal musings and passions these days, but the last thing I expected to see portrayed on the big screen when I settled in to see the new "Barbie" movie this weekend.
Like millions of other little girls, I grew up coveting Barbie's pink "dream house," swanky convertible, and what seemed like millions of envious accessories to complete an endless option of outfits. I'd happily get lost for hours in the world of make-believe. If I had it my way, I would have wanted every Barbie on the shelf.
But not because of the reasons you might think.
Each Barbie came with the perfect set of accessories, and the transformation of Barbie from Pop Star to Doctor to Ballerina to Lawyer with a simple change of clothing represented the unlimited possibilities for what life could become.
My expectations for the "Barbie" movie conjured up images of easy, playful, and thoroughly pink anecdotes. Sure, the cleverly conceptualized story and brilliantly written dialogue did just that. (And was hilarious, too!) But the movie is also quick to point out some of life's more poignant truths: in a world where roles, rules, and societal structures often influence our path, what happens when the status quo isn't working anymore? What happens when change isn't just wanted, but desperately needed?
Barbie's shero journey of change begins with a burst of naive excitement before the harsh realities soon set in.
Venturing out into the great unknown sounds exciting enough (especially when a big problem has set in...Gasp! Flat feet!). But it also means a departure from stable, predictable routines and the world you've always known.
Solving the problem seems like a simple solution, until you recognize that you're not quite sure what happened to the world around you - or who you're becoming.
There are three tools that can support this process of change that Barbie finds her way through as she navigates her journey:
Adaptability
Resilience
Courage
These weren't qualities that Barbie didn't already have, she just didn't know how to put them to use, until she had a little help.
Adaptability shows up any time we learn, and grow, shift, or adjust.
Resilience happens every time we fall (or fail) and try again.
And courage is on full display every time we show up and step forward, choosing to start again.
Barbie represented all the things a girl could be, accomplish, or share with the world when she grew up. Solving the world's problems and living the perfectly curated life was just a change of accessories away...right?
Although it's not quite that easy, the truth is we can't know how much we are capable of if we are never pushed out of our comfort zone (or in Barbie's case, her Dream House).
Barbie creator Ruth Handler created Barbie to be aspirational - with the revolutionary idea that this doll might help girls imagine what they want to be when they grow up. Our lives are constantly unfolding. And that’s great: sometimes what's up ahead is greater than we could imagine.
In my recent book, Embracing the Unknown, I reflect on this aspirational gift of writing our own ending: "There isn't an owner’s manual for change—or for being human, for that matter. But there is comfort in the reminder that venturing out into the unknown is never the end of the story."
Change. Hard, but inevitable. Yet, it's the only surefire way to help us discover the life we truly want to live.
I guess the cat's out of the bag.
Or in the case of Barbie, the truth - and she - are out of the box.